Thursday, April 10, 2008

Douchiest of the Douchies

Donald Trump is the devil. I swear by it. He is Satan and he rules Hell on Earth with his horrible hair and ugly ass face. If I could kick this man in the crotch, I so would. Not that it would hurt anything, but still, I would put on some steel toe boots and kick away.

What brought this on? How could Christie, this kind and loving woman, have such an obscene hatrid for this man?

E! Entertainment. That's what brought this on. I was watching a show about the 20 most expensive celebrity weddings, because I am shallow like that, and here comes The Donald. All full of hot air about how much he spent on that obnoxious affair. Whatever. He is such a douche. Anyway, as I was saying, he was naming off these other rich fuckers and saying how he only had the "best" people at his wedding and how having them there made it better. Blah.

Like having other pompous windbags at your wedding meant it was better than everyone elses? As if. Anyway, I was just so disgusted with him and everything that came out of his mouth, I had to turn it off until he was gone.

He honestly is the most horrible person on this earth. He is so involved with money, I swear he has a vault of money that he dives into, just like Scrooge McDuck. Don't get me wrong, I would love a vault of money that I could dive into, too, but I wouldn't be a cock shiner about it. Honest, I wouldn't.

And I haven't even spoken of his taste. I'm sorry, but gold is ugly and tacky. Have you seen his high rises, homes, buildings, and that monstrosity down in Florida? They are all paved in gold. Gold on the floors. Gold on the ceilings. Gold toilets. Gold faucets. Gold. Gold. Gold. You can cover everything you own in gold but it will still look cheap and ugly. He is just too gawdy for me. Everything he does is gawdy.

Ugh! I do feel better about purging myself of this hatred and sharing it with you. I don't care if you all disagree and want to jump on his old wrinkly penis and have his spawn, I think he is the epitome of all that is wrong in this world.

Hands down.

Cock shiner.


Barry said...

I am not sure hge is the devil, but definitely on the same team :)

Marcia said...

I work across the street from Trump SoHo. Yeah, that's right, the bldg that's 2ce as tall as any others around it, that's a huge monstrosity of glass and steel, that had a guy fall from it (it's still under construction) and get DECAPITATED right in front of my building.

I effing hate Trump.

Princess in Galoshes said...

I never liked The Apprentice, either, for what it's worth. Bunch of little devil-wannabes! They're all slimey in that I-prioritize-money-above-everything-else way.

Mighty Dyckerson said...

I grew up in a house that was built in the 70s. The shitter in my bathroom was harvest gold. It was great because you never had to flush after taking a piss.

Not that I would anyway.

Sorry, what were you talking about???

Just telling it like it is said...

but you got to love the comb over!!

captain corky said...

Trump bores me to tears.

Guilty Secret said...

I can't wait to call someone a 'cock shiner' in the pub tonight. I was going to stay in but I think I need to get out too find someone to use that on.

And Scrooge McDuck - HA!

Beth said...

I think he must have a very, small, tiny penis...he makes his buildings SO BIG, he is clearly in Penis-Envy Mode...poor old wrinkled man. His "houses" are atrocious....I can't stand him...his voice, his hair, his....EVERYTHING!

Pompous ass

Yoda said...

I've been to the Trump tower on 5th ave. Gawdy!!

Crystal said...

how the hell did he wind up with such a hot daughter? i don't think there is a woman who holds genes good enough to make up for his. must have been the servant's kid.